I saw a boy with copper
hair with eyes of matching colour, sitting on the chair beside my bed, goofily
grinning at me. His hands were playfully juggling the fruits which I was sure
were taken from the fruits basket for me. I admitted I was slightly impressed
by the deft juggling but his presence made me jerk up from my bed in shock.
“Who are you, freak?” I
snapped. I didn’t know why but I hated the goofy grin plastered on his pale
face.
“Man, this is the second
time we’ve met and you still couldn’t remember me? I’m deeply hurt.” He
replied, grinning.
“Who are you?” I
repeated. This time my voice was stern. It wasn’t like me to let myself being
ridiculed.
“Eric.” He merely
replied.
“Leave me alone you
freak! I didn’t know any Eric.” I said.
“I’ve learnt that
pleasing everyone is impossible especially you, but pissing everyone off especially
you is easy and funny. And trust me Ivan, I will not leave you until we did
what we are supposed to do.”
“Don’t you have anything
else to do? Instead of being lazed around here, you should do something
better.”
“Hey, I’m not lazy. I’m
just highly motivated not to do anything but be with you. You should be proud.”
Suddenly, that famous
catch-phrase rang a bell. It sounded very familiar to my ears.
“I remember you now! You
and your lazy motivation principles!”
“Wow.
This..is..awkward.” He replied.
We spent our time
together until the visiting hour was over.
***
Daffodils, tulips, roses
and leaves were dancing to the soft music blowing under the clad in grey sky.
The grass emitted a strong smell indicating they were just done bathing under
the rain pour last night. In a blink of eyes, the sunlight cracked through the
stretched horizon, lighting up the world, waking up everything to face yet
another day. I was woken up by the morning breeze that blew through the open
window. When the sunlight penetrated through the window, I shifted to my left
trying to avoid my eyes from the God’s light. Hmm..it’ll be good if I continue
the sleep now. It’s very cozy…
“Wake up! Tsunami is
coming!”
My heart skipped a beat,
my eyes went wide, and my body jerked on its own spontaneously.
“Dude, chill. It’s me.
Eric.”
“YOU ALMOST KILLED ME!”
“That would be the last
thing I would do, Ivan.” He replied. I saw a hint of sad emotions running
through his eyes before he inverted his eyes downwards, staring to the floor,
still smiling.
That’s bizarre, I
thought to myself. But I couldn’t bring myself to say anything.
Silence.
I kept on staring my
blanket sheet. For some unknown reason, the silence around us was very awkward,
in fact, it was almost uncomfortable.
“Hey, your doctor is
very cute!” He said enthusiastically breaking the awkward silence between us.
“Huh? What?”
“You should not eat
those apples there.” He said pointing to a basket of apples on top of the
shelves in front us.
“What? Eric, what’s your
point? Cute doctor? Apples? Are you okay?” I asked.
“Oh, it’s nothing. You
know what they say, an apple a day keep the doctor away. But if the doctor is
cute, forget the fruit.” He said to me uncaringly but there’s a secret hint of
smug on his face.
“Eric?”
“Yes Ivan? Do you want
to thank me for being super genius?”
“No. There’s something
you should know.”
“What?” He asked while
looking at me intently.
“Firstly, my doctor is a
male, just like me and you.”
I can see his expression
changed into disgust.
“Secondly, he’s a 54
years old!”
All I can hear then was
his hysterical laughter.
“If that’s the case, I
think you should finish the apples as soon as possible Ivan!” He said, laughing
to me.
“It’s a little too late
for that Eric. I’m already in hospital.” I replied, smiling to him.
“Why don’t we go to our
hide out? It’s been long isn’t it?” He asked.
“Yes! I’ve been staying
here, doing nothing beside lying down and stuffing myself with foods. I don’t
understand my mom. She’s too paranoid. I can hardly move to anywhere.” I
complained to him.
In my eyes, in a
flickered of seconds, I thought Eric looked a little distance after hearing my
complaints. Just a few ticks miliseconds, I saw his facial expression
changed. But immediately, I brushed it off, thinking it was just another wild
thoughts of mine. Then he explained to me his plan to get me out from the
deadly boring place. I was very eager and childishly excited to execute the
plan. While waiting for the right day and the perfect timing to get out from
the hospital, we talked and laughed while reminisce our memories together. It
felt divinely good to be able to talk to him like we used to again.
***
It was the night of full
moon. We intentionally had chosen this day because by then, the silvery
moonlight would light up our path. That was what Eric said anyway and I knew I
had no other choice but to trust him in this matter. In fact, he was the
experienced tour guide and I was now a tourist revisiting his lane of childhood
memories. I was no longer the resident of this small town. Previously when we
were little, the townspeople prohibited us from exploring the forest because
they said it was dangerous. However, like any other kids, we never listened. We
threw caution to the wind and together with a few others, explored the green
mountains. We were lucky enough that we never got lost because Eric was such a
natural in jungle trekking. He knew his path well, as if he was part of the
forest itself. He knew every tree, every flower and every animal that crossed
our path. He was also the one that shielded us from any harm that might come
our way such as the deep gorge, the slippery earth and the vicious water
currents. He had the best instinct and that instinct had always protected us.
We had explored many
parts of the forest together with others but there was only one spot that we
kept it private only between us. Eric said he did not want to share the spot
with anyone else but only to a friend he dearly trusted. It was their hideout
place. He also said to me once, a long time ago, that the place would symbolize
their friendship. It meant the world to me when Eric said that.
I smiled to myself. The
forest’s surrounding was now becoming more familiar as we walked up the hill.
Immediately my senses became more and more alive as we delved deeper into the
heart of jungle. It was only the two of us embraced by Mother Nature. The scent
of rotting leaves beneath my feet wafted to my nose, my eyes registered the
sight of wild flowers bathed in moonlight, my hands deftly pushing the brambles
and branches that were in my way, while my ears savoured the shrill cry of the
midnight cicadas and the crunch of my lone footsteps.
Lone footsteps?
I shocked myself with my
own thoughts. Why would I only hear my own footsteps? Eric was just an arm’s
reach in front of me. It was not possible that he didn’t make any sound at all.
The earth was a thick layer of dried leaves and branches. I blinked, disbelieved.
It was either I had my eardrum broken without notice, I was now a madman or I
suffered from both. While I was trying to brush away the thought that suddenly
gave an eerie feeling in this half-dark forest, I strained my hearing in hope
it become more sensitive and proved my imagination wrong.
“Why are you stopping
Ivan?” Eric turned around so suddenly and asked. I couldn’t help but jump. I
tried to regain my composure in time but Eric was definitely faster.
“You just jumped! I saw
that!” He burst out laughing heartily. He laughed as if my shocked expression
was the funniest thing in the world.
“I didn’t jump.” I said,
embarrassed at being caught by him.
“You just did.” Eric
grinned. “What? Are you scared of the dark now?” I gave him a death glare, the
usual sign I used when I wanted people to shut up and stop their ridicule.
“You can’t threaten me
with that glare. I was immune to those glares already. I have a First Class
Degree in Ivan’s Anger Management, majoring in pissing you off and minor in nullifying
every and each of Ivan’s insults.” Eric grinned, to which I responded by
jokingly punch him the face but he easily dodged it.
We laughed at each
other’s lame jokes when suddenly Eric stopped talking once we arrived at a
clearing in the forest. He silently pointed to the sky. His eyes brightened.
We were now under the
glow of the stellar sky. A myriad of stars spread across the inky cloudless
sky. The celestial bodies aligned at their respective places, forming various
summer constellations.
I swore I had never felt
this close to the sky.
“See that constellation
over there?” He pointed to a clump of stars that aligned in a semi circle like
a ‘U’. “That’s Corona Borealis.” Eric said. “If you imagined two dots over it,
it will become a smiley face.”
I laughed. It was indeed
true. It was as if there was a face smiling down on you if you imagined there
the presence of two dots.
“Then that is… “He
pointed to another star system.
“Hercules.” I continued
and flashed him a pretentious snobbish, arrogant look.
“I didn’t know you knew
the summer skies.”
“I’ve always loved
watching the sky.” I sat down before I let myself fall onto the grass, uniting
with the earth as one with your eyes staring right at the sky. I wondered what
would it be if the earth had eyes, would this be the kind of view that it would
see? Nothing would obstruct your view of the sky - no buildings, no skyscraper;
nothing of the human civilization could interfere.
A moment later, Eric
joined me. There were two of us, lying on the ground, naming the stars and
reminisced our past like we used to do. Eric asked me what I had wanted in the
future, but when it was my turn to ask him about what he wanted to do, he
tended to avoid the subject. Though honestly, I didn’t mind at all. Maybe it was
not the right time to tell me.
I didn’t notice the
passing of time. I was too absorbed in sky watching – the stellar beauty was
too mesmerizing to take my eyes off it. Suddenly, Eric got up, brushing the
grass off his clothes. He towered over me, blocking my view of the sky.
“There’s one last thing
I wanted to show you.” He said. “After that, remember, I’ve fulfilled my
promise to you.”
“What promise?” I asked,
confused. I tried recalling but nothing came to my mind.
“Just follow me.” He
jogged away downhill and I cried out asking him to wait for me as I scrambled
to my feet to chase after him.
“Hurry up slowpoke! We
don’t have much time left!” He shouted, waving.
I closed the distance
between us and steadily followed him. Eric didn’t stop running until we arrived
at a river bank. I looked around. There was nothing to be seen except for the
dark waters flowing dangerously downstream. Looking at the downstream gave me
an unpleasant feeling somehow. But then something caught my eyes.
A faint glimmer in the
distant.
Suddenly, the glimmer
expanded across the river. Shimmering orange lights danced around slowly,
encircling a dead tree trunk by the river. The dance of fiery glimmer was
breathtakingly spectacular. The pale moonlight complemented the ephemeral tiny
creatures so the scene was picturesque.
“Fireflies.” The word
blurted out from my mouth and I spent the next few minutes watching the firefly
with Eric beside me. A meaningful, satisfied smile was on his face.
“Ivan! Ivan!”
A voice echoed in the
forest calling out for my name. I gave a puzzled look to Eric but he returned
exactly the same expression.
“They come to find you.
Busted. Damn it.” Eric laughed light heartedly. “But that’s a good thing. It’s
not like I have much time either. But I’m glad I’ve kept my promise.” Eric, the
ever so cheerful Eric, suddenly had a melancholic smile on his face just like
the smile he showed to me in the hospital. “So it will be no problem if you go
with them. So…” Eric seemed to fidget. “Farewell friend.” Eric turned around
and walked away from me.
The puzzlement doubled.
“What are you talking about Eric? Where are you going?” I shouted to Eric but
he didn’t stop walking into the forest. I was in a dilemma of surrendering to
the search team or to follow Eric. I chose the latter. I was about to move my
feet in his direction when an agonizing pain struck my head like a thunderbolt.
I clutched my head and cried in pain, involuntarily falling onto my knees.
“Eric!” I shouted. In my hazy sight, I saw Eric was slowly engulfed in the
blackness of the forest, leaving me. And behind me, I heard rapid footsteps
advancing towards me.
“Are you okay?” A man in
his early 40’s asked as he came closer. I nodded weakly. I knew this man. He
was one of my previous neighbour. I scanned each faces. They were all familiar
faces. In the small town like Mahogany, everyone knew each other.
“With whom did you come
here, Ivan?”
I suppressed the pain. “I
came here with Eric.”
I thought I noticed
every face of the search team paled before I fell unconscious.
***
“Ivan, we should’ve told
you about this, long before now. I’m... no we’re both sorry Ivan.” My mother
said to me. She was holding my father’s hand so tightly her knuckles turned
white. My father rubbed his thumb onto my mother’s hand, probably trying to
calm her down.
I stared at my mother,
waiting for her to tell me what she had in her mind. I was pretty curious but I
kept my face straight.
“I want you to remain
calm.” My father said.
“Yeah. Go on. What is
it, Mom?” I replied, nonchalantly.
“The truth is, Eric is
long gone. He was the one who saved you from drowning last summer. Did you
remember?” She paused. “I hope you stay strong Ivan.”
My mind went blank. My
hands trembled vigorously. I felt cold and lonely.
Eric? Gone? Drowning?
My head was spinning in
confusion. Sudden flashback of the lost memories flooded me. Fragments of my
memories were like jigsaw puzzles pieces interlocked and tessellated with each
other, slowly forming a perfect picture of a complete memory. By then, I remembered
how I got into accident. I was on my way back from visiting Eric’s grave when I
ran into a car and knocked my head. I did remember reading ‘Son, Friend,
Bestest among The Greatest.’ on his tombstone.
My heart was racing,
beating abnormally. Thinking about Eric, it kills me inside. Bit by bit. I miss
him dearly as my best friend. Did he really die because of me? Why my Lord? Why
me? Why us? When I heard the truth from my mother, I suddenly felt a lump
in my chest. My throat felt hoarse, I could taste Savanna. And I felt like I
had been engulfed with darkness, I felt suffocated. When my sight was
blurred with the tears in my eyes, I asked my parents to leave me alone. My
mother was reluctant at first seeing my condition, but thankfully my father
asked her to leave with him. Tacitly, she acquiesced my father. I felt the
weight of her sympathetic stare while she was walking out with my father but I
refused to look at her. Because at that very moment and afterwards, my mind, my
heart, my soul, every and each part of me was thinking about Eric.
Eric; my best friend. Oh
my, for all the hatred I had towards him when we first met, I wished I could
take it back now. Yes. I hated him back then when we first met. Thankfully,
being Eric the Shameless one, he ignored my hate and kept on tailing me like a
loyal dog. Until now, my mind could not grasp what was on me that caught his
interest. He was famous, teachers loved him, girls queued just to talk to him,
and boys used him as their inspirations.
Me? I was nothing back
then. But with Eric, I felt like my life was colourful and more meaningful.
Back then, I failed most of my subjects except Arts and Literature. Like any
other unpopular kids in high school, I was practically invisible during my high
school year so nobody likes me, because no one noticed me. If they in three
million years actually did, I would hate them anyway. I was probably, no,
definitely the most introverted person in the whole universe. And no, I am not
going to admit my mistake of hating people because unlike other kids, I grew up
alone, without my parents. Instead of loved by my mother, I was taken care by
my babysitters. Instead of loved by my father, I was taken care by my
caretaker.
Am I blaming them now?
No. I’m not.
Since I was a kid, I understood.
When they chose for international meeting over my birthdays, I understood. When
they missed my first day at school, I understood. When they missed my first day
at college, I understood. Given the circumstances I could comprehend what
adults said when I was a baby, I think would understood my parents too when
they left me to be taken care of my babysitter. When I started to discover the
world and rebel like any other teenagers would, I honestly understood my
parents when they took me away from Mahogany Town as my punishment. When I took
art course instead of business like they had wanted, they started to react
coldly towards me. And I understood that too.
By then, I knew. They
had given up on me. Who would’ve not? I gave up on myself. But, the Shameless
one did not. He, who was the first person who said ‘hi’ on my first day
in school, the first person, every year, without fail, wish me “Happy
Birthday”. He, who kept on tailing me despite the harsh and rude words I threw
at him, acted like my mother and my father, my brother and my sister. He was my
only friend, the greatest one and my only family. And now, he is a history, a
beautiful past, and a now ‘was’.
“Listen to Describing
the Sky whenever you feel down. It’s a paean I dedicated for you Ivan.”
“Well I’m forever
your fighting partner,
Yeah I can hold you
above them for days,
You see, my arms are
strong and I’m focused.
We’re in store for
better days,
Oh no, I don’t need to
see,
Just tell me what it
looks like above the clouds,
Describe the sky to me,
just describe the sky to me.”
My tears nearly fell on
my cheek and being the egoistic man I am, I wiped it away immediately. I tucked
myself in my blankets and went to sleep; secretly hoping that it was all just a
bad dream and would dissolve away soon into nothingness.
But when I woke up again
to a new day, I remembered everything. All the puzzles pieces of my memories
had clicked into place to form a perfect picture. True, it wasn’t a dream, it
wasn’t a nightmare either. It was a thing we called reality. Eric was dead.
Drowned in the same river we used to play during our childhood. To save me.
My parents consoled me
to stay strong to face life ahead. Villagers that visited me said that the
‘Eric’ that visited me was a product of my imagination and I should’ve just
forget about what had happened. But I, myself, knew that the Eric I met,
whether he was an earthbound soul or a ghost, did exactly what the once living
Eric would have done too. I knew him better than anyone else. He was a brother
of mine – one who would never break his promise no matter what happens. I
trusted him with all my life. He trusted me to give me his life.
People kept on telling
me the Eric I saw was due to my concussion but deep in my heart, I believed
Eric did come back to fulfill his promise – our promise – made ages ago. It was
a promise he made right before the unfortunate accident took his life.
“Hey Ivan, if somehow
you’ll return back here next summer, I’ll bring you to our secret hideout to
watch the stars and the fireflies. It’s a promise.”
Eric. My brother.
My best friend.
Credits:
My friend and editor,
Shahirah Amirah binti Suhaimi
Big D and the Kids Table
for the lyrics of Describing the Sky. You can listen to it in the blog's
playlist :D
My roommates Nur Ain
binti Ismail, Zahratul Nur binti Mohd Fauzi and Farzana Izzati binti Khairul
Anuar
Everyone who is involved
directly or indirectly during the making of this short story